Right, but a fair and balanced way to do that would be to compare and contrast the downside of having kids with the downside of NOT having kids.

The downside of not having kids is much greater, and I think we can prove it from your story. You say that it's your love for your kids that causes the pain, and that's true. But that also means that someone who avoids that pain is only doing so by forgoing something that's actually WORTH the pain. They are forsaking the opportunity to sacrifice part of themselves for the sake of something other than themselves. This is hollow hedonism, and your fragile psyche will eventually collapse if that is it's foundation.

I strongly believe that the right message for young people is not "watch out, normal life is harder than you might think" but "you should make meaningful sacrifices for worthwhile goals." That's the path to maturity.

It's possible to become mature without marriage and kids, but marriage and kids are BY FAR the most direct route. They are also most people's single best chance of building something bigger than themselves.

You and I might see this differently, but look around Medium when you get a chance. There's a lot of undermining of traditional responsibilities and not nearly enough people standing up for them